Monday, August 31, 2015


Aww, last day of August...

I suppose that's okay. Labor Day's coming up soon, and I'm looking forward to fall.

Brochacho: me 2 football season yea

Yes, Brochacho. *sigh* His next game is 3 hours away.

I'm really sorry about posting late, I was just so caught up with school, and we had to find Brochacho a dress shirt...

So there is a new German exchange student at our school. He's a million feet tall and needs some biscuits and gravy, but he seems pretty nice. Apparently he has a real talent for basketball. (Shout out to my German readers! Do you guys have basketball?) He's also quiet, so I've been trying to decide how to share my very little German without being awkward.

Brochacho: impossible


We actually have a lot of exchange students! A majority of them are Asian, but there's the German boy and a Bosnian guy. (Bosnia's near Russia, I think. Second shout out to my Russians!) I feel for them because English is a very intense language to learn with all the grammar and stuff. Heh, even I struggle with it.

On Sunday my family and I went to go see a movie called "War Room." It was Grade A-Mazing (see what I did there?), and I would highly recommend it! It's about the power of prayer, and it will change your life. While we were there I met someone you guys might know...

She was very sweet. Her husband was there too.

So, for all my international readers out there, I have an international pun! (We'll stick with Germany because my family is German.)

I saw an angry German guy playing soccer today. He was being a Sauerkraut.

See you next week!
Your Royal Paleness

Monday, August 24, 2015


Today starts my first full week of high school...

Last week was my first few days. Monday we had all classes (that was kind of confusing), then Thursday was A day and Friday was B day. (To clarify, our school is on an A day/B day schedule thing, so we only have a few different classes everyday instead of all at once.)

Let me tell you about some of my classes:

  • Visual Arts! So far we've pretty much just drawn circles. It's still a great class, though!
  • English I: There are literally 9 people in the class, and it's wonderful. (8 of those are girls.)
  • PE: Like I said last week, my teacher is Brochacho's football coach. It's already very intense and very painful.
  • Geometry: Eh, it's okay. I love my teacher, though- she's a bit of a hippie.
So yeah, you practically go to school with me now. Back at home, The Astronaut Wives Club ended. We're all very devastated.

Brochacho: im not

Speaking of Brochacho, he wanted me to post this video:

Brochacho: ha yea

I think the woman in the video stole my identity.

It is my understanding that many people will actually be starting school tomorrow, so I have a word of advice (as well as a pun) for those of you who are also starting high school.

You: Oh my gosh, Your Royal Paleness is giving me advice! This is the best day of my life!!!

When you physically enter your high school building, do not start belting out songs from High School Musical. I learned very quickly that high school is not actually like that in real life, nor will anyone join in on your amazing moves.

Brochacho: u r so embarrassing

You were just jealous of my performance.

Haha, I didn't actually do that, but I wouldn't recommend trying it out under any circumstances. You will become a social pariah.

Alright, my friends, I now bring you the long-awaited pun to brighten up your Monday:

I asked a new kid why he brought a ladder in his backpack. He said it was because he was going into high school.

Goodbye summer...
Your Royal Paleness

Monday, August 17, 2015


School starts this week. *sigh*

So Wednesday I start high school. I'm not quite sure what to think, seeing as people always have different opinions about it. While some look back at high school like this:

...most describe something similar to the GIF below.

As you may have guessed, I was extremely disappointed when I discovered real high school is nothing like High School Musical.

But there are some upsides, I suppose. The lockers aren't 5 inches tall anymore and you can eat outside if you want (but that's where the sun lives). Speaking of lunch, our school has this thing called SMART Lunch where we can go to study sessions and stuff a few days of the week. We find that very helpful in the nerd community.

I also have PE this semester (joy), and we all know how that goes for me. (If you missed the Boccerball post, click here.) And what makes it even better is my teacher is Brochacho's football coach.

Brochacho: yea domi8, my sister

It's kind of hard to dominate with cankles.

That reminds me, Brochacho's first game of the season is Friday!

Brochacho: we 2 shall domi8

He already had a scrimmage last Friday (but "no one keeps score at scrimmages" *wink*). I think they did pretty well.

Unfortunately for me the team has 3 away games at are all at least a few hours away... but thankfully I don't have to ride back on that sweaty bus.

Anyway, today's pun will be about geometry, a class I'll be taking this year!

We're not getting anywhere in geometry; it feels like we're going in circles.

(I'm sorry, but that's actually pretty funny.)

Happy new school year everyone! I guess...
Your Royal Paleness

**P.S. Shout out to my Yankee Grandma, who had a birthday yesterday! We gave her red cabbage instead of a cake... (just kidding). Happy Birthday, Grandma!

Monday, August 10, 2015


Good morning, my loyal readers! (Or good evening, depends on where you are.)

Before we get on with the puns, I'll give you a braces update. The pain is significantly less, however I do feel like a teething child in some places. Also, biting with my front teeth is detrimentally unpleasant. But I can pretty much eat real food now.

Moving on, last week my church's youth group went around the city and did service projects as a bridge to share Christ. My team held a VBS for a daycamp and helped some teachers move their classrooms. It was a lot of fun, and we got to share Jesus' love with a lot of people!

Also last week, lots of new TV episodes and premieres came on, including Project Runway! Let me tell you about it, in case you missed it:

  • Gravity Falls: With a bit of comic relief from all the anomalies and mystery, Dipper introduces us to his favorite game "Dungeons, Dungeons, and More Dungeons." We also meet a new creature known as the "centaurtaur." Thanks, Mabel.
Clearly it was a very good week for TV.

Our pun today, in order to reciprocate for the extremely depressing episode of The Astronaut Wives Club, will be about space!

Did you know the planets keep safe in cars with asteroid belts?

Enjoy your week!
Your Royal Paleness

Monday, August 3, 2015


Yay, it's August!

I know you're absolutely dying to know about my week, so I'll tell you.

Brochacho: theyre not

Actually they are. So, as I told you Tuesday, I received temporary train tracks on my teeth, which are so much fun. *cue eye roll*

Let's list off some of the more fun effects, shall we?

  • It takes a three hours to brush my teeth now. You have to go above the braces, on the braces, under the braces...
  • Brushing is also extremely painful, and it must be done at least 3 times a day. I practically live in the bathroom. If you see a random ginger at school with a bag of oral hygiene products, it might just be me.
  • I know what candles taste like. They give you some wax to put on any uncomfortable brackets or anything. It gets in your food.
  • Food is very limited. It's not so bad now, but early on it was a horror to chew on anything. I've been living off "just add water" meals.
Those are just a few, but it's okay, it's getting better. We visited some family in another Southern city this weekend (here's a hint where) and not a lot of people noticed. So now I have for you a pun that is both [somewhat] Southern and brace-related!

I met a deer who had braces the other day. He told me he had buck teeth.

Be sure to leave your brace struggles below in the comments!
Your Royal Paleness